Why Your Kid Doesn’t ListenJun 16, 2022
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Tired of repeating yourself over and over…and over? Can’t figure out why your child doesn’t listen? This is the episode for you!
I’m talking about why it's not effective to repeat yourself, why you do it anyway and how you’re using it as a way to rescue your kids (and yourself) from negative consequences.
Why Your Kid Doesn't Listen
Because repeating yourself and reminding your kids over and over again isn’t just infuriating - it actually prevents them from developing responsibility.
Your kids don’t listen to you when you tell them what to do because you haven’t trained them that it’s in their best interest to listen to you.
You haven’t shown them the impacts of their decisions, so they aren’t learning how to make better choices.
This is totally normal, and it makes sense. You want to protect your kid. You don’t want them to fail.
But protecting them in the short-term also means that they aren’t learning the bigger lessons that will serve them in the long-term.
Creating Effective Consequences
What’s the alternative? Teach your kids to THINK . Make decisions. And then experience the impact of those decisions.
Being cold because they forgot a jacket, getting a low grade because they forgot to turn in an assignment, having to sell a toy or game to pay for a lost coat, that's how kids learn responsibility.
Kids who are rescued from those impacts don't build resilience.
Kids become resilient when they fail, and are taught how to fix their mistakes.
Listen to the full episode for specific examples, lots of practical tips and ways to support yourself through uncomfortable learning experiences.
- The commonly-used consequences that don’t really work
- The actual goal of parenting (and it isn’t just doing what you say)
- The ways you might be rescuing your kid (or yourself) from experiencing the true consequences of their actions
- How to notice if you’re rescuing your kid and what to do instead
Connect With Me:
- Follow me on Instagram @darlynnchildress or Facebook @calmmamacoaching
- Join Calm Mama Club
- Book a call
In a results-based model of parenting like I teach, you lay out the expectations, tell your child what might happen based on their choice and then let them choose.
Inside Calm Mama Club, I give you everything you need to set limits, connect behaviors with the impacts they cause and guide your children through fixing their own mistakes.
You get access to a full course, a community of support and live group coaching calls twice a week, so you are never in this alone!